Attack of the Redneck Mommy

Hello Mr.Computer Teacher! on Nov 6, 2009 in Comedy My son stormed through the front door after school the other day, tossed his backpack down and as he kicked off his shoes he glared at me and announced, “I’m really mad at you, Mom.” I looked at him and quickly ran through any possi...

Just Call Me Tits McGee on Nov 3, 2009 in Comedy This summer, as I was sweltering at my uncle’s funeral, with rivulets of sweat trickling between my breasts and making my boobs itchy, Opportunity knocked at my door. There I was, discreetly trying scratch the itch away, not realizing no matter...

It Takes A Real Woman To Look Like A Man on Nov 2, 2009 in Comedy Last week my entire family was struck by the plague. Which is why this here little blog sat quiet and empty for so long. I was too busy mopping up puke and doling out Tylenol to the feverish masses to try and write. I’ve been asked if it was th...

How To Piss Your Friend Off on Oct 23, 2009 in Comedy After the dismal week this week has proven to be, I decided to cut myself some slack and abandon ship. I’m handing over the parental reigns to the first adult who knocks on my door, whether it be a stranger, my sister, or my husband and I’...

Life and Death on Oct 21, 2009 in Tear Jerker On this day, October 21, six years ago, a child was born. He was small, no bigger than the palm of a small woman’s hand, weighing slightly more than a few feathers. His entrance to the world was too soon, too abrupt, unexpected. He fought to li...

I Dont Just Touch Myself on Oct 19, 2009 in Comedy This weekend, in a fit of frustration and fury, my teenaged daughter slammed the car door and stormed off, aggravated that I wouldn’t let her do something all of her friends get to do. “When I grow up and have kids, I hope I’m nothi...

Morning Jolt on Oct 16, 2009 in Comedy Overheard at the breakfast counter this morning when the kids were eating breakfast as I was trying to rub the cobwebs out of my brain and drag my arse out of bed. “I wonder what Mom got you for your birthday today Frac.” “As long a...